There are Stories to be Told: Start a Family Tradition
“ How did you and Grandpa meet? ”
One of the most rewarding ways to use your outdoor living space is to
gather your family members for a reunion. Perhaps it's a small group
that gets together annually, or a large one whose far-flung members
attend every two or five or even 10 years. Whether large or small, a
reunion is a wonderful opportunity to knit families closer together
through shared stories.
In the much-underrated 1990 film Avalon, a Russian immigrant to 1940s
America relates the disintegration of his family ties. In his young
manhood, his children gathered at the feet of older relatives during
family gatherings and listened to tales of their heritage and
history. As television took hold of society in the late '50s,
children and adults alike opted for the entertainment of television
personalities, instead of the stories of their roots.
But just as the art of listening to stories has gone by the wayside,
so has the art of telling them. Here's how to re-start a tradition of
storytelling at your family reunion.
ò Advise all who will be attending that there will be an
opportunity to tell some stories about the family, and let them know
you'd love to hear them share something. Especially encourage older
ones to think about their children when they were young, their own
childhood, or even stories they may remember from their parents. With
only a little effort, you can be hearing about things that happened
over a century ago.
ò Have some questions prepared to start the ball
rolling. "Where did your family go on vacation when your children
were small?" "How did you and Grandpa meet?" "What's the funniest
thing one of your children ever did?" "How did you manage through
tough times?"
ò Encourage storytellers to use descriptions that will engage
all of the senses. Was the thunder rolling in the distance just
before the downpour when Grandma and Grandpa bumped into each other
running for cover? Did the scent of the lilacs in Aunt Ellen's garden
waft in through her kitchen window? Was there a cool breeze on the
beach near the family vacation campsite? Did the sun sparkle off the
snow on the mid-winter drive to Uncle Max's? Was the strawberry jam
your mom made the sweetest you ever tasted? Use touch, smell and
taste as well as sight and sound to bring the scene to life for
listeners.
ò The best stories have a point. "That's when I first learned
how important it is to be on time." "If it hadn't rained that day, we
might never have met, and most of you would never have been born!" It
doesn't have to be profound, but be prepared to help your tellers
wrap up their stories with a short statement of its significance.
ò Get the younger ones involved too -- perhaps you can
encourage them to be official family historians who will record the
stories. If there's a group, give them papers and drawing materials
and ask them to make pictures of the scenes they will hear unfold.
You can have the older ones label the drawings and then gather them
together with ribbon. Each family can take home their personal family
album.
ò If there are old photographs that support an account, or a
time period, mount these in archive quality materials and display
them in a shady spot or pass them around while the story is being
told. Use other mementos as well. Your great-grandfather's railroad
watch that he wore to work every day for 45 years, or a playbill from
your first date will help bring life to the accounts of those special
times.
So gather your loved ones on your porch or patio and make some
memories while you start a storytelling tradition.
Debbie Rodgers, the haven maven, owns and operates Paradise Porch,
and is dedicated to helping people create outdoor living spaces that
nurture and enrich them. Her latest how-to guide "Attracting
Butterflies to Your Home and Garden" is now available on her web
site. Visit her at www.paradiseporch.com and get a free report
on "Eight easy ways to create privacy in your outdoor space". Mail to
debbie@...
